hi fellow cocksuckers!

if you haven't realized it yet, cyberspace isn't even tangible, but somehow it feels more real, than the "real" world. the say internet and everything that came with it has changed us. but maybe it has just revealed our nature. anyway, if you haven't guessed yet, this blog is me yapping about anything and nothing at the same time :D

can we ever be free?

We've grown up under some sort of system that has been shaping and evolving for thousands of years. These systems have been influenced by nature, wealth, education, landscape, culture, and more. Some of it feels nice, but for me personally, a lot of it sucks. I feel like I'm governed by a ruling class of wealthy, beautiful narcissists. I feel powerless. Even if I wanted change, I wouldn't know where to start. If I tried to stand up for myself at work (I work as a cashier leader at Tesco - nothing prestigious), even if my demands were justified and all I wanted was equal rules for everyone, I would still be easy to replace. If I, a 22-year-old single woman with a dog, living at my childhood home with my father, didn't want this job, some desperate single mother of four surely would. I feel like a coward. I've realized that if I were a character in a movie, I'd be the one sitting on the bus in the background - insignificant and replaceable.

My Pussyfication

When I was young, I didn't know how fucked up the world really is. One day (I was 7 years old), I read an article in a teen magazine about a girl who decided to become a vegetarian because she felt bad for the animals. There were images of slaughterhouses, the terrible conditions these animals live in, and more. She described the gruesome details of animal farming. I was horrified. I had never imagined anything like that existed.

Another instance of me witnessing animal cruelty was when I was even younger - maybe 5 years old. I was playing with the chickens in my grandma's garden when my grandfather grabbed one and chopped its head off. I didn't understand what was happening. After being beheaded, the chicken was still running around, and I wanted to play with it, only to realize it didn't have a head. I was confused. I'm not even sure whether I was sad or not - I was in shock and didn't comprehend what was going on.

After reading that article at 7, I convinced my parents to let me become a vegetarian. It was hell at school. They force-fed me meat almost every lunch, even after my mum came there many times telling them I didn’t have to eat it. They would yell at me, and while I often stood my ground - crying but refusing to eat it - other times they shoved it into my mouth. Afterward, I’d feel this terrible guilt, like I was a pussy for giving up on the animals.

Looking back, I think today I'm an even bigger pussy. Not about meat - but about standing up for myself at work, in life. I no longer strive to get my point across. I'm no longer a vegetarian either. I very rarely eat fish, maybe once or twice a week. As Kurt Cobain said: "It's okay to eat fish, they don’t have any feelings."

Honestly, I think 100,000 imperfect plant-based eaters are better than 100 perfect vegans. Unless you're doing it for your ego, of course. I'd like to consume less animal products in general, lower my dairy intake. But at the end of the day, all the vegans, vegetarians, flexitarians - they're really just trying to make themselves feel a little better. Because our efforts get immediately wiped out by some fucker having a meat feast or gorging on ridiculous amounts of animal products to "get his protein in."

Plot twist: he doesn't need all of that, and it’s just ruining his kidneys. And sometimes I wonder - should we even try? What's the point of mopping the floor when some asshole's just gonna come and shit all over it?

SITE UNDER CONSTRUCTION!!!

Rants & Drama

People suck. Authority sucks.